Chipwitch Today!

The Sun

The Sun is in Capricorn

The Sun is at 24 Cap 34' 41", and is 147150308km away and receding.

The Moon

The Moon is in Pisces

The Moon will change from Pisces to Aries in the next 24 hours.

The Moon is at 16 Pis 27' 17", and is 364622km away and receding.

Moon Is In Pisces

Oh, buckle up, cosmic cadets, because the Moon is splashing around in the dreamy waters of Pisces and it's about to get as surreal as a Picasso painting on a Star Trek episode. The Moon is currently chilling at a cosy distance of 364491.124948204km away. Yes, I'm precise, I love my numbers, I mean, who doesn't love a good decimal point? It's like the period at the end of a sentence that just decided to elevate its game. Now, this lunar-Piscean mashup is going to stir up your emotions like a cosmic KitchenAid mixer. Don't be surprised if you find yourself tearing up over a cute dog video or pondering the existential meaning of pizza toppings. But don't get too comfy in your sea of feelings. The Moon is about as stable as your Wi-Fi connection. In the next 24 hours, it will hitch a ride on the celestial expressway and move into the fiery sign of Aries, which is basically the astrological equivalent of swapping out your yoga mat for a pair of roller skates. So, embrace the emotional tide while you can, my friends. Dive deep into your feelings, swim with the dolphins of your inner world. And when the Moon meets Aries, strap on your helmet and prepare for a wild cosmic ride. Remember, change is the only constant in the universe, and also, apparently, in your mood swings. Enjoy the journey!

Mercury

Mercury is in Capricorn

Mercury is prograde at 01 Cap 15' 60", moving at 1.13 degrees per day, and is 158914479km away and receding.

Mercury Is In Capricorn

Mercury In Capricorn

Alright my cosmic comrades, grab your telescopes and business suits because Mercury has just punched its time card in Capricorn! Capricorn, the Bill Gates of the celestial sphere, is all about making those Benjamins and climbing the corporate ladder of the cosmos. With Mercury, the messenger of the gods and the planet of communication, venturing into Capricorn's territory, we're all going to feel a little more like an interstellar entrepreneur.

Now, during this transit, our thoughts are going to be sharper than the pointy end of a unicorn's horn. I mean, we're talking laser-like focus, folks. We're going to be able to cut through the foggy marsh of our minds and zero in on the ideas that will make us the next Steve Jobs... or at least help us finally organize our sock drawers.

But here's the cool part – Mercury in Capricorn is like a celestial jigsaw puzzle master. It takes all those random thoughts zipping around in our heads like hyperactive space monkeys, and it helps us arrange them into a beautiful picture of clarity. As clear as a supernova exploding in the dark vacuum of space. Once we've got that mental blueprint, we're ready to beam up our ideas into reality!

But, hold onto your lightsabers, because there's a potential asteroid field we need to navigate. With Capricorn at the helm, we're suddenly more aware of the pecking order than a hen in a chicken coop. Conversations can quickly turn from constructive to controlling faster than you can say "Warp Speed!" We all think we're the commander of the starship during Mercury in Capricorn, so if we spend too much time arguing over who gets to sit in the captain's chair, we're not going to get anything done.

So remember, space cadets, keep your eyes on the stars, your feet on the ground, and let's use this time to turn those big cosmic dreams into an earthly reality!

Venus

Venus is in Sagittarius

Venus is prograde at 20 Sag 02' 34", moving at 1.23 degrees per day, and is 189768693km away and receding.

Venus Is In Sagittarius

Oh, stargazers! Cupid has traded his tiny cherubic wings for a jetpack and is blasting off into the stratosphere because Venus, the planet of love, money, and all things groovy, has hitched a ride with Sagittarius. Remember your first science fair volcano? That's right, we're talking explosive, uncontrollable, and potentially messy! But hey, you also won the first prize, didn't you? That's the kind of energy we're dealing with these days. Sagittarius, the cosmic Indiana Jones, is all about adventure, so expect your love life to become as unpredictable as Schrödinger's cat. Old habits? Boring relationships? They're as likely to survive as a chocolate teapot on the sun. We're in the business of trading up, folks – for something more exciting, more daring, more...quantum physics-y? And speaking of quantum physics, remember Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle? How one cannot simultaneously know both the position and velocity of a particle? Well, that's love under Venus in Sagittarius for you. One moment it's here, the next it's gone – faster than light, just like those pesky tachyons. So, how to navigate this cosmic chaos? Keep it light, keep it open, and whatever you do, don't take things too seriously. I mean, we're all just stardust swirling around in the infinite universe, right? Beware though, trust and honesty are key during this transit. You might feel like you've wandered into a Star Trek episode where everything's bigger, brighter, and more advanced. But remember, not all that glitters is dilithium crystals. And as for your wallets? Well, Venus in Sagittarius might make them lighter than a hydrogen atom. But hey, if you're going to part with your hard-earned cash, why not invest in a new course or a trip to explore an alien world? So, put on your lab goggles and fasten your seatbelts. With Venus in Sagittarius, we're in for a cosmic ride that's more thrilling than a journey through a wormhole. The sky's not the limit, it's just the beginning!

Mars

Mars is in Capricorn

Mars is prograde at 07 Cap 57' 33", moving at 0.75 degrees per day, and is 355736783km away and approaching.

Mars Is In Capricorn

Attention Earthlings: Mars in Capricorn Alert!

Alright, stargazers! It's time to put those rose-colored glasses in the drawer and pull out your trusty telescope because Mars - yes, that fiery, red planet we all know and love - has glided into the steadfast, no-nonsense sign of Capricorn. This means one thing: it's time to get real. And by "real," I don't mean confessing your undying love for Star Trek to your unsuspecting coworkers. I'm talking about taking a long, hard look at what you're doing with your life.

Mars in Capricorn is a bit like Captain Kirk on a mission - determined, focused, and with a strategic plan to make sure no tribble goes unturned. It's time to boldly go where you've been too lazy or scared to go before, folks! This cosmic event is all about setting clear goals, prioritizing your tasks, and actually getting things done. So, you know that DIY rocket ship you've been meaning to finish in your backyard? Now's the time to do it!

Do beware though, neither Mars nor Capricorn is known for their cuddliness. They're more like Spock - logical, rational, and not particularly concerned with your feelings. This can be great in terms of productivity, but not so great if you're trampling over others in your quest to conquer the universe. Remember, even Darth Vader had a soft spot. Don't forget to show some compassion to the Ewoks in your life.

So dust off those dreams, oil up your gears, and prepare for liftoff. With Mars in Capricorn, the sky isn't just the limit - it's the starting line. But remember, while it's great to aim for the stars, don't forget to come back down to Earth every once in a while. After all, we've got some pretty cool stuff here too - like pizza, Netflix, and cute cat videos. Happy stargazing!

Jupiter

Jupiter is in Taurus

Jupiter is prograde at 05 Tau 58' 34", moving at 0.05 degrees per day, and is 703009006km away and receding.

Jupiter Is In Taurus

Jupiter, Taurus, and the Hitchhiker's Guide to Your Galaxy

Now, folks, I don't mean to alarm you, but Jupiter is currently in Taurus. And if you're wondering how this celestial shindig will affect your life, well, grab a cup of tea, kick back, and let's dive in. Oh! And don't forget your towel (Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy reference, anyone?).

Think of Jupiter as that quirky, wise old professor who keeps offering you sage advice, even when you're not asking for it. Now, combine that with Taurus - the zodiac's most stubborn sign that's so chill it could give a snowman a run for its money. When these two cosmic forces dance, it’s like finding your car keys after a week-long search - the answers have always been there; they were just hiding under the couch of your psyche. So dust off that spiritual lint and tap into that dormant wisdom!

With Jupiter in Taurus, it's like having your own personal cheer squad encouraging you to chase your dreams. We're talking about making to-do lists that would make a project manager blush and checking off items like you're playing cosmic bingo. It's not about rushing though; think of it as a slow-cooked cosmic stew of success.

Oh, and did I mention that Jupiter is basically the Oprah of planets? You get good luck! You get good luck! Everyone gets good luck! Taurus, on the other hand, is the zodiac's Bill Gates. Together, they might just give you a financial boost that'll have you dancing like Scrooge McDuck in his money bin.

But let's not forget that Taurus has a sweet tooth for life's finer things and isn’t shy about indulging. So, when Jupiter, the planet of 'go big or go home', teams up with Taurus, we might find ourselves blurting out, "Treat yo self!" a bit too often. Let's remember to keep our impulses in check and not go overboard.

So, folks, as Jupiter orbits in Taurus, remember to enjoy the ride, grab those opportunities by the horns, and always know where your towel is!

Saturn

Saturn is in Pisces

Saturn is prograde at 04 Pis 36' 47", moving at 0.1 degrees per day, and is 1565696954km away and receding.

Saturn Is In Pisces

Saturn in Pisces: To Infinity and Beyond!

Well, my horoscope-hunting homies, our favorite cosmic taskmaster, Saturn, has packed up his rulebook and moved into the dreamy realm of Pisces. Just imagine Saturn, with his Bunsen burner and safety glasses, going all mad scientist in a world of unicorns and cotton candy clouds. Yikes, right? But hang on; this could be the best thing since Galileo discovered the moons of Jupiter. When Saturn sets up shop in the final sign of the zodiac, it's like having your very own life coach with a PhD in 'Getting Stuff Done.' He's the Dumbledore of tangible dreams, the Yoda of business plans. So, grab your notebook, folks! It's time for a brainstorming session that could turn your wildest dreams into reality. Now, let's not sugar-coat this cosmic croissant. Saturn in Pisces isn't exactly a walk in the park. Imagine your dad, wearing socks with sandals, rummaging through your private diary. Not cool, right? But hey, sometimes we need that nudge (or shove) to clean up our act. So let's greet our celestial drill sergeant with open arms and a fresh cup of coffee. There's wisdom in his words, even if they are delivered with the subtlety of a supernova. This star-studded soiree is happening in the realm of Pisces, the sign associated with sleep and dreams. You might find yourself tossing and turning at night, or feeling more anxious than a proton in a particle accelerator. This is the universe's way of saying, "Chill, dude!" Try some meditation, take a woodland stroll, inhale-exhale-repeat, or just take a good old-fashioned nap. But keep a dream journal handy. Who knows what deep, cosmic wisdom you might dream up? So, as Saturn embarks on his Piscean journey, remember to keep your chin up and your telescope focused. This is a time to dream big, plan carefully, and embrace the challenges that come your way. After all, we're all made of star stuff, and this is our chance to shine. And remember, folks, in the wise words of a certain well-known politician, "Yes, we can!" So let's do this! Saturn in Pisces, here we come!

Uranus

Uranus is in Taurus

Uranus is retrograde at 19 Tau 09' 06", moving backwards at 0.01 degrees per day, and is 2869561144km away and receding.

Uranus Is In Taurus

Well, gather round, space cowboys and cowgirls, 'cause ol' Captain Mal's got some interstellar wisdom to share. Now, you see, Uranus is meandering its way through Taurus, and that's about as comfortable as a porcupine in a nudist colony. Taurus, bless its stubborn little heart, likes things as steady as a Firefly-class ship on a clear flight path. But Uranus? That celestial oddball is all about shaking things up like a Gorram space quake. Taurus would rather keep flying straight, sticking to the same ol' star charts. But where's the fun in that? Even if we're clutching our seatbelts and praying to the 'verse, we've got no choice but to take the ride Uranus is piloting. And who knows? We might just find ourselves in a shinier place once the dust settles. Now, when it comes to credits, Taurus knows the score. But with Uranus at the helm, we better buckle up for some cosmic game changers. Over the next seven years, we might see new currencies pop up like mushroom spores after a rainstorm, banks spinning like a malfunctioning nav system, and our housing and stock markets doing the intergalactic twist. On the home front, Uranus in Taurus is like a call to arms against the money monsters: debt as terrifying as Reavers, taxes as tricky as a Companion's riddle, and rent and mortgages sapping our resources like a leaky fuel cell. It's time to break free from these shackles, folks. Becoming as attached to material possessions as a Shepherd to his Bible just ain't the way of the 'verse anymore. Change is coming, whether we like it or not. So, let's embrace it. After all, as any good Browncoat knows, we make our own luck in this 'verse. And who knows, these changes might just lead us to a new Eden. Remember, my friends, we're all just leaves on the wind, and Uranus is one mighty gust. So, let's soar!

Neptune

Neptune is in Pisces

Neptune is prograde at 25 Pis 20' 16", moving at 0.02 degrees per day, and is 4543509784km away and receding.

Neptune Is In Pisces

Neptune Takes a Dip in Pisces

Listen up, star gazers and celestial enthusiasts! Our dear friend Neptune has decided to take a leisurely swim in the mystical waters of Pisces. So grab your cosmic binoculars (or as I prefer to call them, 'astro-goggles') because this is an astral spectacle you don't want to miss. Now, don't be fooled by Neptune's distance of 4,543,449,849.262938499km away from us. Being the outer space introvert that it is, Neptune might be socially distancing, but its influence is still felt here on our little blue dot. And lucky for us, our cosmic buddy is moving prograde, which is just astro-babble for "forward." So, what does this mean for us Earthlings? Well, let's put it this way: Neptune in Pisces is like attending a hippie music festival - minus the mud and questionable porta-potties. It's all about unity, man! It's like we've been handed a pair of spiritual 3D glasses, allowing us to see beyond the petty squabbles and differences. We're talking a major "Kumbaya" moment here. This astrological alignment is like a cosmic group project. Everyone has something to bring to the table. Maybe you're great at manifesting vegan snacks, or perhaps you have a knack for finding the best meditation tunes. Whatever it is, Neptune in Pisces wants us to explore and share these unique gifts. Feeling a spiritual itch that needs scratching? Now's the time to sign up for that online course in crystal healing, or finally create that sacred zen corner in your apartment - just be careful not to knock over your collection of Star Wars figurines, we know how precious they are. Remember, fellow space cadets, Neptune in Pisces is here to give us a celestial nudge. It's time to share our ideas and dreams, no matter how out there they might seem. After all, if we can accept that a planet billions of kilometers away has an impact on our lives, then surely we can entertain the idea that crystals might have healing properties, right? So, buckle up, friends. It's time to boldly go where no one has gone before - well, at least not since the last time Neptune was in Pisces. Happy stargazing!

Pluto

Pluto is in Capricorn

Pluto is prograde at 29 Cap 48' 44", moving at 0.03 degrees per day, and is 5372149627km away and receding.

Pluto Is In Capricorn

Pluto in Capricorn: A Hitchhiker's Guide to Astrological Shenanigans

Hold onto your cosmic teacups, dear readers, for Pluto is doing the astrological equivalent of a waltz with Capricorn. It's like watching your favorite nerdy scientist (think Bill Nye meets Neil deGrasse Tyson) dance a tango with a goat. It's an odd sight indeed, but strangely fascinating.

You see, Pluto and Capricorn both have a bit of a thing for power, success, and organizing their sock drawers by color and fabric type. They're essentially celestial control freaks. With these two joining forces, you might find yourself being a tad intolerant of other people's viewpoints. For instance, if someone suggests organizing your socks by elasticity instead, you might feel an urge to launch them into the nearest black hole.

But remember, this is Pluto we're talking about, a planet that once got dumped from the planetary club and then reinstated. It's a bit like that weird kid in school who somehow became super popular overnight. So, it's got a few lessons about letting go, even if it means letting go of your favorite pair of argyle socks.

Pluto encourages us to ditch anything that no longer serves us, like outdated scientific theories or that collection of expired coupons. It's a bit like spring cleaning, but with a touch more existential dread. But remember, when one door closes, another opens. And sometimes, that door leads to a closet full of really cool new socks.

So brace yourselves for some cosmic upheaval, and remember - in space, no one can hear you organize.

The Sun

Sun Sextile Neptune

Today will be rewarding if you find the time to express yourself by helping others. Find something artistic through which you can channel your creativity and your soul. Art and music as well as spiritual pursuits are favored today. Try to become one with the Universe today. Creative visualization can be an important means through which your goals are realized. Idealism runs high today.There is an unmistakably dreamy, inspired, and sensitive side to those born with easy aspects between the Sun and Neptune. A marked appreciation for music and the arts is present. The connection of Neptune with the Sun, which represents the ego and the will, certainly softens some of the hard edges that might be found elsewhere in the chart, adding a sensitive and spiritual dimension to the personality. These people are naturally compassionate, especially those born under the trine. It is so completely natural for them to accept that there is more to the world than what is before their eyes, that they tend to presume everyone must be spiritually-inclined. Of course, they come to realize that this is not the case at some early point in their lives. Their attraction to spirituality and metaphysical subjects is usually marked. These aspects favor writers, artists, and musicians. These people are sensitive to those who are suffering, although they are not as easily taken advantage of as those with Sun-Moon challenging aspects. They are humanitarian and often have a special connection with animals. If other aspects and positions in the chart support it, these people are not ones to dominate others or assert themselves to the point of brashness.Some Famous People with Sun in Easy Aspect to Neptune: Sextiles – Mick Jagger; Trines – Farrah Fawcett, Billy Corgan, Muhammad Ali

Mars

Mars Trine Jupiter

Today is the day to expand and set new plans into action. Broaden your horizons and don't limit your possibilities. Business ventures are favored, as is higher education, legal matters, spiritual endeavors and charitable pursuits. Luck is all around you today, but you have to make it happen. Don't just sit there waiting for it to come to you.You tend to be restless and prone to boredom. You need a partner who can keep up with your lightning responses to your environment - and one who truly understands your love of intellectual competition and sparring.You have tremendous personal resources with which to achieve your goals. Although the goals you set for yourself are likely to be somewhat ambitious, you are willing to work hard to see that they are achieved. Ever since you were a child and learned to invent indoor games to amuse yourself, you have steadily worked at developing your intellectual skills. This prepared you to deal well with competitive situations in your adult life.Communication is important to you. Your dramatic delivery and flair for using the right words make you a formidable opponent in any debate. It is particularly difficult to win a debate with you because you only present information that is well documented and convincing. You also use this skill to come to the aid of others who cannot defend themselves intellectually, which is admirable indeed!Others admire your confidence and straightforwardness. You respect others who stand firm on their convictions and have high ambitions. It is important that everyone who deals with you does so with honesty and integrity.In your love life, you appreciate a partner who is intellectually strong. You have a strong sex drive, but without the mental component, no relationship will last very long. You also seek a partner with spiritual consciousness. Your warmth and enthusiasm on a sexual level is apparent, and you don’t tire easily. Your interest doesn’t fade easily over time. — Interpretation sample from our LoveStyles report.This aspect indicates a harmony between your intellect and your physical strength, and you will most likely have little difficulty achieving your goals in life. It may appear to others that you are lucky sometimes, but you are also good at applying your talents to attain the desired results. You have a natural ability to be in the right place to grab new opportunities or to initiate a well-timed project. You are often successful in competition but sometimes may not even enter the contest because it doesn’t seem worth it to you.You are honest and forthright in your dealings with others, and you tend to trust others readily. You can be a bit careless about spending money, however, and this is probably because you are so eternally optimistic that there will always be plenty around. The possibility of failure does not enter your mind, although success itself is not that important to you–you’re just being you.In your relationships you are attracted to others who also seek a harmonious lifestyle. Your sexual nature is very strong, but you seek more than physical gratification from your mate. You want someone who will share in your life entirely and grow to know and understand you intimately. You appreciate a partner who is intellectually strong. You have a strong sex drive, but without the mental component, no relationship will last very long. You also seek a partner with spiritual consciousness. Your warmth and enthusiasm on a sexual level is apparent, and you don’t tire easily. Your interest doesn’t fade easily over time, either.Interestingly, you are able to be assertive without stepping on others’ toes. This is an important part of your attractiveness to women. — Interpretation from our LoveStyles: About Him report.Note on the differences between trines and sextiles: The trine aspect is the more dynamic of the two harmonious aspects. Those with the sextile can call upon these traits when needed, and those with the trine between the Mars and Jupiter have incorporated the traits of the aspect into their personalities, expressing them naturally and consistently.Alternate, short interpretations: Interpretation sample from the Merlin report – Mars sextile Jupiter or Mars trine Jupiter: *Your self-confidence and vitality are strong and you believe you can do just about anything you want to. You have an enterprising spirit, a good sense of timing, and the ability to sense what will succeed and what won’t. You usually make fortunate decisions in work or business activities. You enjoy healthy competition and you have a rather playful, good-humored attitude toward it. You mostly compete with yourself to see how far you can go or how much you can accomplish. You like to keep stretching your limits.Interpretation sample from the Your Spiritual Path report – You are usually able to direct your will to productive activities. You find the transcendent component in each relationship and build upon it. You exemplify joy in your daily activities.Interpretation sample from the Karmic Insight report – You have developed the capacity to direct your masculine/active, yang energies in healthy and positive ways. Thus, you have confidence in your “masculine” strengths and abilities. Ennobled by ideals of fair play and concern for the broader social implications of your choices, your actions are most often fortunate, leading to success and increased opportunities. A gift for leadership and inspiring others is also yours. Physical playfulness is an important way you can re-create and rejuvenate yourself.Some Famous People with Mars in Harmonious Aspect to Jupiter: Sextiles – Bill Cosby, Drew Barrymore, Serena Williams, Richard Speck, Vanessa Redgrave, Robert Pattinson, Peter O’Toole, Oliver North, Galileo, Patrick Duffy, Phil Donahue, Catherine Deneuve, Danny DeVito; Trines – Upton Sinclair, J. R. R. Tolkien, Cheryl Tiegs, Gregory Peck, Bob Marley, Henry Miller, Brian Eno, Leonardo Di Caprio, Dick Butkus, Roseanne Barr, Ben Affleck.

Jupiter

Jupiter Sextile Saturn

Progress can be made in business and professional affairs, especially regarding law, politics, education, religion, and travel. A certain seriousness toward career and life direction is evident. Organized expansion into new areas can further your goals. You have a serious minded, responsible attitude toward achieving your long range goals.You have an underlying self-confidence that is based on your belief that life will give you whatever you want if you are willing to work for it. You see the reasonableness in the way that things happen and are willing to invest in yourself. You are very industrious, believing that hard work will bring you progress. You have a taste for material acquisition but are willing to work for what comes to you. — Interpretation from the Indra report.The trine aspect is the more dynamic of the two harmonious aspects. Those with the sextile can call upon these traits when needed, and those with the trine between the Jupiter and Saturn have incorporated the traits of the aspect into their personalities, expressing them naturally and consistently.Jupiter trine Saturn: *You have a good balance between idealism, optimism, and vision for the future on one hand and a realistic sense of what can actually be achieved on the other hand. Your judgment and business sense are usually quite good. You possess patience and the ability to accept limitation and frustration on the way to your goals.Older, more experienced individuals or mentors are likely to play a significant and beneficial role in your life.Jupiter sextile Saturn: *You have the patience and the stamina to realize your visions and bring them down to earth, a fine balance between hard work and realism, and a positive, hopeful spirit. You grow through following systems and plans, and taking one step at a time. Overnight success or instant enlightenment is not what you aim for. Your patient, well-balanced approach gives you credibility with many different types of people, and you are apt to gain an excellent reputation for being able to do big things without overreaching or becoming pretentious.#You have the capacity to endure through the daily grind to find something of spiritual value in your work and relationships. You are happy to spend time in seclusion, studying or meditating.