By The Chip Witch on Monday, 11 September 2023
Category: Taurus

Taurus Report

"Lord of the Rings' Gandalf Predicts: Taurus, You Shall Not Pass...Up These Stellar Opportunities!"

The next Taurus will start in 222 days, at Saturday, 20 April, 2024

The Moon moves to Taurus in 20 days, at Sunday, 01 October, 2023

Mercury moves to Taurus in 248 days, at Thursday, 16 May, 2024

Venus moves to Taurus in 232 days, at Tuesday, 30 April, 2024

Mars moves to Taurus in 272 days, at Sunday, 09 June, 2024

Jupiter is currently retrograde in Taurus

Uranus is currently retrograde in Taurus

The Waning Crescent moon is currently 26.1 days old. The next new moon is at 1:40:05, 15 Sep 2023. The next full moon is at 9:58:21, 29 Sep 2023.

Greetings, fellow space voyagers! As your astrological Captain Janeway, I'm here to navigate you through the cosmic waters of today's horoscope! So, strap in, set phasers to fun, and let's boldly go where no Taurus has gone before! Now, listen up, my bull-headed friends, because we're in for a bumpy ride. Jupiter and Uranus are both in retrograde in your sign. I know what you're thinking, "What does that mean, Captain?" Well, buckle up buttercup, because it's about to get as rocky as a Klingon love poem. You see, when Jupiter goes retrograde, it's like the cosmic equivalent of a replicator malfunction - instead of that delicious Earl Grey tea, you might end up with a cup of gagh (worms for those who don't speak Klingon). Expect some unexpected challenges and growth opportunities. Uranus in retrograde? Now that's like trying to perform a mind meld with a Tribble - it just doesn't make sense. Expect sudden shifts in your life – perhaps a surprise promotion at work, or maybe your pet tribble has suddenly learned to sing opera. Embrace the chaos, my friends. It is the Starfleet way. The Waning Crescent moon is a bit like Neelix's cooking, it's not fully there, but boy does it pack a punch! Use this time to reflect, meditate, and prepare for the next full moon, which is coming faster than a warp 9 emergency call at 9:58:21 on the 29th of September. So, to all my Tauruses out there - grab life by the horns, channel your inner Vulcan for calm logic during this tumultuous time, and remember - resistance is futile, but disco is not. #JupiterRetrograde #UranusRetrograde #WarpSpeedAhead #TaurusTrek #StarfleetHoroscopes #CaptainJanewayGuideToTheGalaxy #Nerdstrology

#Taurus

SignToday Is Posting: 11.09.2023 07:12:01 (tau-11-09-2023)

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