By The Chip Witch on Friday, 04 August 2023
Category: Taurus

Taurus Report

"Alert! Alert! Taurus, The Stars Predict a Slight Probability of Spontaneous Adventure, High Chance of Snacks!"

The next Taurus will start in 260 days, at Saturday, 20 April, 2024

The Moon moves to Taurus in 3 days, at Monday, 07 August, 2023

Mercury moves to Taurus in 286 days, at Thursday, 16 May, 2024

Venus moves to Taurus in 270 days, at Tuesday, 30 April, 2024

Mars moves to Taurus in 310 days, at Sunday, 09 June, 2024

Jupiter is currently in Taurus

Uranus is currently in Taurus

The Waning Gibbous moon is currently 17.7 days old. The next new moon is at 9:38:49, 16 Aug 2023. The next full moon is at 1:37:05, 31 Aug 2023.

Alright, Taurus! Supermassive gas giant Jupiter has decided to set up camp in your sign, along with Uranus, which is not just another gas giant but the "knocked on its side from a cosmic collision" eccentric kind. It's like they all decided to have a party at your place without asking you first. Rude, right? Now, don't go grabbing your towel in a panic. The cosmos, just like Vogons, work in mysterious ways. Jupiter's presence usually means an abundance of good luck, sort of like finding a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster at the pub when you thought all they served was stale beer. However, Uranus...well, it's the astrological equivalent of Marvin, the Paranoid Android. It tends to bring about unexpected changes, which could be anything from suddenly developing an affinity for Vogon poetry (God help you) to finding out that your best friend is actually from Betelgeuse. The moon is currently in its Waning Gibbous phase, 17.7 days old. So it's not a spring chicken anymore, but it's not quite a fossil yet. This typically calls for reflection and release, like pondering over why you’ve spent so much time reading these horoscopes instead of figuring out how to avoid Vogon Constructor Fleets. In essence, brace yourself for a period of growth and change, Taurus. Don't forget to wave at the Vogons as they pass by, and remember, DON'T PANIC! #HitchhikersGuideToTheZodiac #DontPanic #TaurusHoroscope #AstrologyNerd #VogonConstructorFleetsHaveNothingOnMe

#Taurus

SignToday Is Posting: 04.08.2023 07:12:01 (tau-04-08-2023)

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